Friday, January 17, 2020
Every Silver Has A Cloud Lining
So much for things going well at work. I received a swift kick in the face today. Got my manager’s performance review evaluation back – and was granted the rating “Achieved”, which is the Grade C of performance reviews. In my self-evaluation, I had given myself a rating of “Exceptional” or Grade A. I thought this might come down to “Exceeded” (B), but not to come down by 2 grades. Very, very unhappy about this. I worked my ass off over the last year, including sacrificing numerous summer weekends to meet exceptionally tight deadlines, and ultimately did a great job on fulfilling my responsibilities – but I have never got any sort of recognition for my hard work. No bonuses or awards at the time, and now a distinctly average annual review. And, as a result, a smaller annual bonus as well. Apparently, my manager was telling me, they couldn’t grade me any higher this year because I got promoted last year. But I cry BS. That, or the whole performance review process is just a total farce and sham. Is there “cultural” bias in any of this? I can’t be sure, but it wouldn’t be a surprise. Are a number of other undeserving people going to get better ratings and/or promotions? Undoubtedly. Am I the victim of a flawed process, or a departmental hit job? I’m being told it’s the process, but I don’t totally believe it. All I know is that I’m disappointed, angry and demotivated – and if I’m going to be rated as an “average” employee, then maybe I should act like an average employee. I’m better than most of the people here, and I think the people that I work with know that, but apparently the people who actually matter don’t. So screw them – and screw my positive attitude to the job. If this is how they recognize probably the most fulfilling professional year of my life, then I will treat the job with the same contempt they’ve shown me.
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