Crazy Golf

There is something fundamentally tragic and humbling about not being able to beat a 7 year old and a 10 year old in a competitive game of minigolf.  I am clearly not the awesome player I thought I was.  Quite the opposite in fact.  I had plans of taking up golf when I retire - but I already had some serious doubts about my golfing abilities.  But now that I've also proven I have next to no minigolf skills, I can consider these dreams well and truly shattered.  What a disappointment.  What sport am I going to take up in my retirement now?  It seems almost inevitable it's going to be Bowls (though I can't even beat a 7 year old and a 10 year old in a games of boules either).