Worried

Operation Ihavegottomove is off to a slow start.  After 3 days of fairly extensive scanning of ads for somewhere to rent, I have yet to find anything that meets my initial criteria and is enticing enough for me to inquire about it.  Disappointing.  I don’t think my initial size/location/cost criteria are particularly demanding, so maybe I’m just being too fussy.  Worst, the thought has crossed my mind to stay in my current place a bit longer.  NO.  I do not want to entertain that possibility – I HAVE to move out, for the sake of my sanity and the dread of dealing with all the issues that come up over summer.  Hopefully, more appealing choices might crop up in the next week or so – I have to make an official decision on whether to extend my lease in about a week’s time, so it would be nice to find somewhere before then.  But even if not, then perhaps deciding not to renew my lease and the resulting urgency of having to find somewhere will be the kick up the ass I need.  I have an image in my mind of what I’d optimally like to find – but I’m reluctant to articulate it because the reality will inevitably disappoint.  That is classic behavior for me – for all my negativity I am a dreamer, and reality has yet to fail in letting me down.  Must channel positive thoughts – I will find somewhere nice to move to, I will find somewhere nice to move to, I will find somewhere nice to move to…