Wednesday, May 3, 2023

Another Moan About Work

I've decided I need to restrict myself to one moan a week about work.  And since I had a 1-on-1 meeting with my manager yesterday and found out some stuff, this is my one for this week.  I got hit with a quadruple whammy of bad news.  1: I told my manager that I was thinking about asking for a personal leave of absence.  I didn't say this, but I'm sure she knows - but I'm not happy with my job right now.  And since I'm not leading any projects, only supporting, I'm essentially just a unit of resource and can be easily replaced - so this seems like the perfect opportunity to take some extended time off.  However, my manager quickly shot down that plan.  She told me not to do it as there wasn't likely to be a job for me when I want to return.  Well, that's disappointing on all sorts of levels.  I guess they don't value their best employees enough to do what they can to retain them, which is contrary to everything they say.  Apparently there is currently a hiring freeze, and they were expecting lots of people to quit after getting their bonuses - which normally happens, but apparently didn't this year.  This suggestion is that we are overstaffed, but my impression was that there are some areas which don't currently have a lot of work (like mine) but others which have way too much work (which is why we are supporting them) so it all kind of balances out.  I guess not.  2. And another surprising consequence of this is that apparently it is no longer so easy to convert from being an office-based employee to being a remote employee.  Something else I have strongly been considering.  Which is also very discouraging.  3.  Something I found out yesterday is that I won't be going to a conference this year.  Again.  I can't remember the last time I went to one - it's been well over 10 years.  I did express an interest in attending one later in the year in Washington DC.  But there are only limited slots available to attend.  And they also said that you would be expected to do a presentation when you're back in the office - something I would be very reluctant to do, since I suspect I would spend most of my time playing tourist in DC rather than attending any actual talks/presentations.  What is stupid is that I believe my job title entitles me to attend 2 conferences a year, but then there are never enough slots available to ever be able to achieve that.  Even more ridiculous is that although our company restricts the number of people who can go to external conferences, a whole bunch of us are flying down to California for an internal "data symposium" in a few weeks time.  Which is a total and utter waste of time and money - I've seen the agenda, and nothing interests me.  I'm already thinking about whether I can sneak off into San Francisco for a half-day or more.  Expect more about this in a future blog post.  4.  And then, despite this supposed hiring freeze, apparently someone who left just before the pandemic is going to be returning to our department soon.  Someone who I think was on my level when she left (despite being a lot less experienced, and frankly also a lot less competent, than me), but who I think is returning at one or maybe two levels higher than me.  Which is shocking, if not surprising.  I don't think it's coincidence that she's best friends with my manager.  A classic example of favoritism and nepotism.  Not happy about this at all - which is the all the more unfortunate since I actually get on quite well with her.  And, I don't need to tell you this, but she's also Chinese.  I guess I'm not going to become less racist any time soon.    

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