Team Winded/Team Full of Wind

A ping pong update.  We started a Ryder Cup style tournament this week, and I played my first game today.  If I’m the #2 seed at work, then I played probably the #4 seed.  And after a rocky start where I dropped the first game, managed to power through and win my match 3-1.  Giving “Team Wind” (not my choice, awful name) a 2-0 lead on Day 1 of the tournament.  I believe I’ll be playing next on Monday.  Although ultimately it is the result that matters, very disappointed with how I played.  My style of play – aggressive and a power game – allows only for a small margin of error, which quickly becomes a liability when I tighten up under pressure – as I am sadly prone to do, particularly with people watching.  I suffer from glossophobia -  a fear of public speaking - and this is very much an adjacent phobia and symptom to that.  I don’t know why I get so anxious, but I do.  And this has manifested itself in so many aspects of my life, particularly my social life – so it should come as no surprise that it affects my ping pong game in a tight and well fought match.  I’m a crowd-pleaser and I don’t want to play conservatively, so I do go for a lot of winners - I think people like watching me play because I am prone to outrageously good and outrageously bad shots, and a lot of muttering and swearing under my breath (and sometimes not under my breath!).